So, after my terrible Football Mom showing a couple weeks ago, I put in the effort to up my game the following week. I was feeling pretty fine with my Vikings Football Jacket, my hat with my son’s number, and my football pin.
No one could call ME a pansy.
And Kathi let me into the Football Mom Club. Finally…I was real.
Little did I know…
See, THIS week was homecoming. And yes, I expected a big play or two. Even brought in a few of my own.
Like these: Football Earrings with MY son’s number!
That’s right. And just to show my extreme football commitment, I did this:
BLUE HAIR! And I brought in fresh blood – a daughter with BLUE HAIR too, I didn’t die her hair because she is trying to grow hair faster! And she wore my son’s away game jersey.
All in. That’s me. Playing for the win.
Until…
Kathi and my previous Pea-Green Jacket Pal showed up to the game. Laughing all the way.
DOUBLE TEAMED!!
Not only had Kathi rooted through her 20+ year old high school memorabilia, but she pulled out her CCHS cheerleader POM POMS and her LETTER JACKET! And the little instigator/overachiever pulled her Cuz “Nicie” into the play who not only wore a practice jersey, but did this:
FACEPAINT! On a 40+ year old woman.
I mean really, that’s just over the top. Have some dignity.
And just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse, I discovered THIS contraband at the game!
Apparently it’s so she can listen to the announcer call the game. Probably just likes hearing her kid’s name over and over and over. “Johnson on the sack.” Whatever.
I don’t need a radio to know how awesome MY son is. (The one who made his own stellar sack. Recovered a fumble. Rushed in last week’s game for 122 yards and two touchdowns. If someone kept track of that kind of thing.)
And then, of course, there’s the entire row of Grandmas. I mean, how many Grandmas does one kid need? And a grandpa too? I’ll bet they aren’t even RELATED to Johnson.
(Oh, shoot, I’ll bet they are. Everyone up here is related.)
But, not to fear…I may not have Pom Poms or face paint or even a Football Grandpa, but I still have a few tricks plays up my sleeve.
This season isn’t over yet…
Just you wait, Kathi Johnson, just you wait…
Still Scramblin’ Susie